Some time ago, I was helping a small business onboard a new chief executive. While we were negotiating the CEO’s employment agreement, the CEO’s attorney asked if we could prepare a detailed job description outlining the duties and responsibilities of the CEO.
You could have made a great meme with the look on my face as I thought to myself…
“What is this, the Industrial Age? We aren’t hiring File Clerk II – this is the CEO for heaven’s sake.”
Unbelievable. Although we grumbled and pieced together the “job description,” I was tempted to prepare my own version:
- Visionary and strategist (with functional crystal ball)
- Extraordinary team-builder and leader
- Ability to execute! (“Strategy without execution is hallucination…”)
- Chief cook and bottle-washer
- Company psychologist and camp counselor
- The person picking up trash in the company parking lot
You get the picture – the job description should be some combination of “Everything” and “The Buck Stops Here.”
This entire episode struck me as funny – but typical of attorneys that live in the weeds, try to document around every scenario imaginable (to be used as a litigation tool against the other side), and make requests that make your head want to explode.
Rant over…carry on!